And then I became a dad

Six notes from the past ~year

Hi! I’m going to use this Substack in a more personal way.

I’ve published intermittent posts, videos, and newsletters for years and for different reasons. For now, I plan to post to (re)connect with friends old and new, and to share happenings and reflections. Expect fewer edited essays and more simple life snippets.

Substack may have started as a newsletter platform, but it’s becoming a new breed of social network. And I plan to use it as such. Thanks for being in touch. Talk soon!

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Six notes on the last 12 months

1. My son was born in January! What a fun and fascinating grind. It’s a windfall of new experiences—from cluster-feeds to the first daycare drop-off. Watching him grow feels both slow and fast. Always surreal. I’m grateful he’s healthy and relatively chill. Every day my wife and I still say to each other, “Wow, we have a son.” 😅

   

2. Last year, we visited parent friends around the world. I think my wife and I were attempting to not only stock up on travel experiences before the new baby but also see how different parents do their thing. We spent time with my niece and nephew in San Diego. We went on safari in South Africa and stayed with friends and their toddler in Johannesburg.
   
   Different parents have different styles, values, dreams, fears, and boundaries. We collected reference points. It was great to see old friends, with their same spirit, taking on parenthood.

   

   A trip highlight—Yoko spotted a cheetah. 🐆

3. Soleil the cat ate lilies and lives to tell the tale. Apparently, lilies can be fatally toxic to cats. Tell that to our cat Soleil, who spent three days in a vet hospital on IV fluids. Now he’s back at home doing cat things. Traumatic for me. Who knows what it was like for him? Thank you to the powers that be. Taking care of small, living beings can be a roller coaster.

4. Bailey Richardson bid farewell to Substack. My ol’ cofounder at People & Company, co-author of Get Together, and major friend moved on from Substack. We joined the team together as part of an acquisition 3+ years ago. It’s the end of a chapter!
   
   She did killer work—standing up teams like Community, Marketing, and Writer Success. When we started People & Company, Kai, Bailey and I agreed that when one of us was ready to ride off into the sunset (aka do something new), we’d be supportive. It’s no different here. More people deserve to interact, collaborate with, and draft off of Bailey and her stoke.
   
   She spoke about what she learned on the Get Together Substack. Check it out.

   Three years of building community at Substack

5. All Ops, all day. My work at Substack has been a formative tour of running operations for a growing company at our scale. Series B, going from 20 to ~100 employees. Transforming from upstart to incumbent. Starting, managing, shepherding departments like Biz Ops, HR, Finance, Legal…
   
   Learning is what motivates my career, and there’s been so much to juice from the experience of building this company. The needs of the business and my role evolve every six months. I like that. It’s guarantees learning.
   
   If I’ve had one realization, it’s that every business decision offers both technical knowledge and emotional experience. You need to understand both to make even better judgement calls down the road.

6. I’ve been running, through it all. For most of my life, I was a “run 1-2 miles at the gym every once in a while” type of guy. But watching NYC marathoners of all stripes and shapes run through my neighborhood, incepted me. In November ‘22, I ran the NYC Marathon.

   

   I set a goal and made it happen. I don’t think I’m that much faster of a runner but my capacity and perspective on distance is so different. Before, the idea of running 10 miles was unfathomable. Now that’s a normal Saturday. It’s taken a lot of early wake-ups, investment in a coach, and patience with injuries. I’m proud of my discipline.
   
   I ran the Berlin marathon last September with a few friends. Yoko was pregnant and cheered me on. It was our last big trip before becoming parents.

   

   I’ve been running through it all—speed workouts in the morning before work, long runs amidst personal challenges, and stealing 1-2 miles while the kiddo napped during his first few weeks of life. I listen to sci-fi audiobooks while on the road.
   
   The phrase “Life is a marathon, not a sprint” feels off to me. Marathons, for the average runner, are brutal on the body. They involve saving your endurance chips to spend them all on race day and taking significant breaks to recover.
   
   I don’t want to live my life as a marathon. That said, I embrace the idea of a life full of training, stepping out of my comfort zone, and breathing lots of fresh air.